Damn lonely now... i mean what's up with the loneliness... with friends chatting in the chat group and games available...
What's wrong with me?? why do i feel like i wasted my whole 16 years of my life... like i never had an impact on anyone or change something... it's like i'm totally useless... no use at all...
whenever i read or know about what others are doing... i'm always wondering... why didn't i do it... or they are so lucky...
maybe dreams are too far... but nowadays dream is the only thing that is keeping me alive... that one day i will succeed and laugh back at those who teased me... that i could crush their lives the same way they did to me... that i could make an impact on the world...
what's wrong with me?? i want a new chance to have a better life... is it too much to ask??
i'm keeping stuff more to myself nowadays... as i realised whatever i want to do receive objections from my family... even talking is like a crime... i didn't know a conversation could be that hurtful, that painful, that pathetic until now...
a conversation started by me could be thrown back with thorns, stones, sticks, knives, forks, hammer, pick axe... you name every sharp object and you will get the picture...
am i really that useless?? can't i at least do anything right?? is there really nothing that i'm good with that can be recognised by people??
can i say something without being criticised for being me??
can there be a place in the world for me?? can i be accepted??
I want to be a someone...
someone that people remember for who they are and not what they are...
someone that people remember for who they are and not what they are...
1 comment:
hallo darling,
it took me half a century to find myself.
SO be patient.... and enjoy the laughter, tears and sweat ... that we face ... daily...
Post a Comment